What does it mean to be a Mom with Fibro? Well, it means that life will be a little different for that family than the typical household. Because of pain, fatigue and various other complications from this illness, you can't always live as everyone else does.
I am a mother of one daughter, age 5 yrs old. She's wonderful and the joy of my life, but life is not easy......for either of us. She often gets disgruntled that I can't always do the things she wants to do. I can't run and play. It's difficult to sit in the floor and play. I can't be in the sun for long periods of time, nor in the cool weather for very long. I'm sure if she had a sibling, she would be a little more content because then she would have someone else to play with besides myself. But as it is, her father and I are all the play companions she has on a daily basis. She does attend
Pre-K, but that will be out for the summer after 1 more week and also it's only 1/2 days. So I have to be ingenuous about ways to play with her and occupy her time.
Right now I'm in the middle of a bad fibro flair and a migraine that has lasted a little over a week. So I've been in bed a LOT over the last week. That's no fun for a 5 year old. But I try to think of ways we can play, while still lying in bed under the blanket (heat helps the pain of fibro for me). Things such as pretend camping, coloring, drawing.....anything that I can do with her without exerting too much energy, which I'm short on, or having to suffer worsening pain is good for both of us. She needs me to play with her and be with her to show her how much I love her, and I need to know that she feels loved. She also has a playset outside that she can play on. At my worst, I could probably just sit on the deck and watch her playing outside. On a descent day, I can play with her on the playset, albeit carefully! She seems perfectly satisfied with this plan. I know that on my worst days she wishes I could play with her better, but she seems to understand that Mama is sick and can't always do the things she wants. What is important to her is that I'm with her, regardless of what we're doing. Just being there makes her happy.
I've often felt guilt and then anger at what kind of Mom fibro has made me. But I'm coming to realize that we're very close because of how the illness has made us interact.
I have had fibro, arthritis and migraines since before she was born. I was diagnosed about 3 years before she came along. So she has never known the "me" in pre-fibro form. I think it would have been harder for her to adjust had it been the other way around, but I still think she would have adjusted. She a remarkable little girl and I'm quite proud of her. In spite of all the problems I have and the hard times I face, I wouldn't trade being a Mommy for anything in the world. I love it! Hopefully, my condition will improve over the years, rather than deteriorate. But even if it does not I will always be glad for the opportunity to be a Mom. My daughter is my anchor many times. She is the reason I get up in the mornings. Although fibro moms may be different outwardly, we are all the same on the inside..........Our children have stolen our hearts!
May you have a wonderful Mother's Day!!